Thursday's Things New Yorkers Say

It’s that time of the week again: Here’s a little tidbit for TTNYS:

Getting off the N Train in Astoria, two twenty-something guys talk:

“I can’t believe the one time I’m in New York, I don’t see the train,” Drunk #1 says. “Dude… we just got off the train,” replied Half Drunk #2. “What? No we didn’t,” Drunk #1 smiles sleepy and leans on Half Drunk #2… who is looking more like Slightly Buzzed and Really Confused. “Yes we did,” he says, almost worried. Drunk #1 wakes up slightly and looks around as the train pulls away. “Oh. I didn’t see it.” Half Drunk #2 looks at me, then looks at his friend, and shakes his head.

I feel like there should have been a camera, like there is in “The Office.” If there had been, he would have looked at that too (insert blank Jim-Halpert-look here).

Walking to Pace University classes on 5th Avenue and 45th Street:

“Excuse me miss, where do you get you’re hair done? I’ve got a great deal for you,” the walking salesman says. “Virginia,” I say, expecting him to leave me alone. “Virginia Salon?” he questions, following me. I stop and look at him like he’s a little dumb because I’m about to be a little late. “No. Richmond, Virginia. The state,” I reply. He contemplates the answer and shakes his head. “Oh. Well. We can’t compete with that.”

That’s right buddy. Back away slowly. Don’t mess with my Miss Yu Salon back in Richmond. I haven’t gone to another place since second grade!

Sitting at a Starbucks in Midtown, a middle-aged Asian man sits next to me. Some middle-aged New Yorker, with a slight northern accent, joins him.

“The LION has come OUT of his CAGE!!!” Wall Street #1 practically screams to Wall Street #2. He has just signed his divorce papers.

Warning: This week and next week are going to be crazy. Midterms, Broadway plays, apartment-warming parties, pancake breakfasts, work, and class all need to be squeezed into the next 5 days. Updates on the city when possible!